Day 16. Or, the second spy film of the day. Shall we begin?
Actually, before we begin, if you’re a fan of the James Bond series and don’t want to read from someone who doesn’t like it, please leave. You will get frustrated with me. If you don’t mind that stuff, then let’s continue.
Die Another Day. Another installment of the James Bond series. That’s all I really know.
Now, I only watched this film because I was told to by three different people. Let me make this clear: I do not like James Bond. I never have done. I’ve never been interested in ever watching it, especially after seeing a clip of Octopussy when I was younger. Not my cup of tea. But no, I had to watch it. And I desperately hoped that this time around it would be a different story.
No. No no no no no no no. Just no.
I’ll do my best to start with what I did like about it. I liked Q. Rather, I liked John Cleese. He is a genius in everything he does. In fact, he is one of the reasons I submitted to watching this film. And too my annoyance, he didn’t show up until at least 45mins into the film, and then that was it. Angry me? I think so.
I also liked M. Or again, I liked Judi Dench. She was epic. Cool. Calm. Collected. The 3 C’s. Fantastic woman. Her entrance was amazing, and her dissing of James Bond made me so happy inside. Again, she wasn’t in it enough for my liking, and so that really ticked me off.
Another thing I liked: the guy with the crystals in his face. That was the only reason I liked him. I just liked looking at his face. It was fascinating. I didn’t really care about his character, or know really what he was doing. I just love his sparkly face.
Now. What I didn’t like. I could go on for hours about what I didn’t like. I’ll try to keep it brief. No promises though.
James Bond. One word: Dick. He really is. He honestly thinks he is the most amazing man in the world. To a lot of people, he probably is. To me? Arrogant prick. And half the stuff he does is impossible, and so completely unbelievable. I’ll go onto that in a bit though. Pierce Brosnan can not act. I have possibly insulted quite a few people there, but really, he can’t. It’s just so over the top. When M comes in for the first time and he’s being accused of blabbing…oh my life. Over-doing it a bit, Pierce? If he had just kept his mouth shut the whole time, I think I might have been able to handle him.
The sex. Is it really necessary? I mean, he’s a sleaseball! What woman in her right mind would sleep with him? Ugh. The one that really got me though was the random sex scene between that Frost woman and Bond. ‘Oh, let’s just keep up the charade of being lovers, even though you actually hate me.’ ‘Oh, okay, let’s just pretend’ *Strips completely naked* Really? That would never happen! Gah! Rage!
The ‘amazing’ stunts he does. Completely unrealistic. Some of the stuff he ‘did’ was almost laughable! I mean, running and catching up to a moving aeroplane? The amount of time I shouted ‘No’ at my laptop was a good 20 times. Just stupid. Rubbish.
Last thing I am going to mention is the cheesy one liners. I mean, come on! What are you doing? Do you really think you’re cool by saying those kind of things? Really Bond? Really? No. Just no. Shut up and stop it.
So, I liked this film. *ahem* No. No I did not like this film. At all. I hate it. I’m sorry to the devoted Bond fans, but I really do. And believe me, I will not watch another one. I do have no choice now but to watch a third film to get me out of this rage.
Signing out.
This was actually the only Bond movie I’ve ever seen and I believe I saw it in theaters. I believe I thought it was ok, not good not great, just ok. I also heard that Bond is a much much bigger jerk in the books than he is in the movies.
For me, it wasn’t even okay. It was just a waste of my time.
Not sure it’s possible for Bond to be anymore of a jerk than he is in this film…don’t want to find out either…
Thanks for reading!