Seeing as I didn’t completely die during the last review, my friend wasn’t happy. He’s only happy when he sees me have complete mental breakdowns at bad films. This is his revenge…
Howard the Duck. After being transported from Duckworld to Earth, Howard the duck must try to find his way home in a boozy, perverted way.
I think my friend will be quite happy to hear that I’m pretty traumatised by this film. Not as much as other films, since there are actually words to describe this one, but still enough for him to be satisfied.
This was based on a Marvel comic. Not one that anyone I know has ever read, so it can’t really be that amazing. So what went through George Lucas’ mind when he decided he wanted to make it into a film? ‘Ducks, porn, booze, monsters…just what everyone wants to see!’ No, George Lucas. No. What I also don’t understand is how the mind behind Star Wars, Star Wars, can make a film like this. Please. Explain that to me.
The acting was just all wrong. There really was no stand out performance during this whole film. The duck himself was just rubbish voice acting, the woman was crap, the other men that I don’t really know who they are were blah. Oh God. Please can we rid the Earth of every one of these people? I don’t know who they are, so clearly this film destroyed their career in acting. Unsurprisingly, don’t you think?
Oh. I lied. There was one stand out performance. Jennings. Me and my mate had oodles of fun when Jennings turned into Not-Jennings as I affectionately named him. His character uttered the only decent lines in the whole film. These were ‘You barely know him’ and ‘Shut up’. Truly, those are the best lines of the entire film. You’re totally missing out if you haven’t seen this film, folks! Oh, and what got me wound up is that despite telling Howard and bitch-face that he was no longer Jennings but ‘somebody else’ (that line had me in fits, really) they were still adamant that he was in fact Jennings. How many times d’you need to be told that the man in front of you is an dark overlord guys? Sheesh. Listen.
Oh, and the special effects. They were so breathtakingly, outstandingly, jawdroppingly, mesmerisingly, heartstoppingly, Oscar-award-winningly amazing. (If you don’t catch the sarcasm in that…then it’s okay. I forgive you. Go eat a cookie.) This film comes from the man who produced/directed Star Wars. You have no excuse for shitty monsters and laser beams! None! The overlord was honestly the worst attempt of a monster I’ve ever laid my eyes upon! Oh God. The pain. The paaaaaaaaaaain!
Oh oh. Before I forget. There was one highlight of this whole film. That line was ‘It’s a duck man! It’s a duck!’ This line came from a guy that you never see again. Ever. And he put so much effort into that one line. He went all out, put his heart and soul into it. Enthusiasm award goes to you, good sir! I tip my hat to you. You’ve earned a place in my heart. Forever.
So, yeah. This was a bad film. Not the worst I’ve seen, but still pretty damn bad. Really really bad actually. I wouldn’t recommend this to you. In fact, avoid it unless you have a large supply of alcohol and a sledgehammer.
So. I know I’m going to end up watching at least one other film before the day ends. What that film is, I have no clue. Hopefully a good film for a change. I need a good film. Knowing my luck though…
I would never call this a good movie by any means, but I really enjoyed watching it. I rather liked Howard’s voice acting, and while the special effects don’t hold up to modern CGI, the stop motion was pretty impressive for its time. I also think it’s kind of funny that you thought Jennings was the best part of the movie. I thought his creepy voice was just plain silly.
I was comparing the CGI to the Star Wars films, which were much better than this film, and Star Wars is a few years younger than this film too! Haha!
And yeah, I agree. Jenning’s creepy voice was silly. We had fun laughing about it. We just liked the two mentioned lines. That’s pretty much it haha